Brave Love

Being brave is hard to do. Loving brave is even harder.

One of my dear friends is the mother to three adopted daughters. A few weeks ago she was invited to attend a reunion given by the birth family of her oldest adoptive daughter. Being a gracious person, my friend decided to attend with her family. My first thought was that is a brave thing to do. But then again everything about adoption is about being brave.

I mean think about it. No mother-to-be who reproduces her own DNA undergoes scrutinizing home visits, interviews, and stacks of paperwork to determine whether or not she is fit to be a mom. No mother, who physically gives birth to her offspring, waits an agonizing six months or longer to be declared legally "the mother." That takes bravery. I say it takes bravery because knowing there is the remotest possibility that things won't work out and you do it anyways? Then twelve years later the biological grandmother sends you an invitation to come and meet the family. And you do it because you know it's not good to build fences. You decide to build a bridge and you introduce the daughter you've raised to grandmothers, grandfathers, aunts, uncles and cousins who all have what you don't—a biological connection to the daughter whom you love more than life itself.

 My friend is brave. Brave not only because she allowed her daughter to have this experience but brave because she, too, embraced it. As she watched the hugs, the kisses, and the smiles I know a small part of her wondered, "What if she likes them better?" (Not possible.  Not even likely.  But still we mothers hearts are so wrapped up in our children we wonder.  We worry.  My friend quickly dismissed those thoughts because she loves her daughter so much and even though mothers want to keep their children to themselves they know the good that comes from sharing them with the world.

Recipes were swapped. Lunch dates with cousins were set. In an afternoon at the park, a new family was forged. Can you get more beautiful than that?


Adoption is for the brave women of the world. Women who give up their babies unselfishly and women who adopt them and love them who then share them with the mothers who gave them up. My friend could have built fences and walls and kept everybody out but she didn't. She has a brave heart. She is a woman of "a good courage."

Adoption…it's not just about love.

It's about being brave enough

to open up your heart to something bigger.

I Cor. 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind.

It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud.

It is not rude, it is not self-seeking,

it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs.

Love does not delight in evil

but rejoices with the truth.

It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.

Love never fails.