Raising Kids is Like Raising Chickens--Love Unstoppable

So, my kids and I are the proud parents of five adorable, tweeting, fluff balls! My oldest daughter and her friend talked me into buying two baby chicks on Tuesday. We started out with two. But we found out that you need more than two chicks for them to be healthy grown-up chickens. So, by Wednesday, we had five baby chicks.

The chicks are so cute that we have spent all our time obsessing over them. We haven't cared that they tweet through the night and that they're up at dawn, tweeting some more. Yesterday, the little black one, named Scarlet/Oreo, put its wing around the yellow chicky named Jacq. They cuddled in the corner of their box and we were beside ourselves!

 

Okay, so, the crazy thing is...we know these cute, adorable chicks are going to grow up and someday be BIG chickens. We know they aren't going to be cute and adorable forever. But right now, we don't care because we're in the honeymoon phase of raising chicks. We're caught up in the slow motion movie in our head where we're frolicking through the meadow with baby chicks running behind us. Can you see it, too?

Sadly, these babies are not going to be irresistible, tweeting fluff balls forever. In fact, I've never thought of big chickens as cute or adorable, or really anything. So, when does this "honeymoon so in love with baby chicks phase" wear off?

 

Raising chicks is just like raising kids. First, God gives you the "honeymoon phase." You fall in love with these helpless, adorable, fuzzy-headed, precious babies, whose burps are even cute. You love them so much your heart hurts. But then, when they're two, they paint your wall with blue nail polish (daughter #3). And when they're eight they play soccer in the house and break your favorite glass candy jar (son #1). Then when they're 16 they drive into a parked car at the grocery store (hasn't happened, yet, but probably will). Then when they're 21, they call you and say, "Mom, I've just eloped." (This happened recently to a friend of mine and part of her was beside herself and the other part was okay. She told me, "All I said was, 'I'm here for you when you need me.'" Yikes! Cute or adorable "chicks" do grow up to do not so cute things!

 

So, why do we have "chicks" in the first place? Why doesn't God warn us that raising "baby chicks" can be hazardous to our well being? And why doesn't he warn us that we're only going to hold them long enough to turn around and let them go? Because...God made the love we have for our children. He made it strong enough to withstand earthquakes, tornadoes, and tsunamis. He knows, with His love, we can see our children through anything. That love we felt for them as "baby chicks" is unstoppable.

 

As I hold this tiny, yellow, baby chick up against me, I know it won't be much longer and it will be too big to hold. The day will come, all to quickly, when I will need to let it go. So...I'm going to love these baby chicks into chicken-hood. I'm going to relish in the memories of holding them, watching over them, worrying about them, and tending to their needs. And then I'm going to trust God to help me to let them go.

P.S. Will you remind me I wrote this when my daughters goes off to college? And when my son goes on a mission? And when my youngest daughter goes to kindergarten? And when...

"A baby is God's opinion that the world should go on." -
-Carl Sandburg

LOVE Is In the Air! (Literally)

This past summer, I attended education week classes at a nearby university.  The last class of the day was on increasing the LOVE in your relationships. Sounds like your average marriage class. But it was far from it. The LOVE lesson I learned that day will stick in my mind forever.

 

My friend and I found two open seats near the front of the classroom. We sat down and pulled out our notebooks and pens.  Within minutes, the room filled with eager students ranging from ages 18 to 75. The instructor began an informative discussion about the three Greek words that define the most important word in the English language...L-O-V-E.

The instructor explained that . . .


"Eros is the romantic kind of love."
"Philos is brotherly love. The deep love you have for family members and good friends. "
"Agape love is god-like love. The unconditional, giving, serving, and sacrificing kind of love."


Interestingly enough, as the instructor began describing eros, I spotted a young couple (very young) sitting near the exit door. They couldn't keep their hands off each other. I thought to myself, "Ah, ha! That's eros in action." And believe me, there was action. Fingers through the hair, back rubs, shoulder rubs, and arm tickles. For 50 minutes straight the strawberry blonde and her bronzed counterpart were obviously engaged in eros. I guess you could say they were a very effective visual aid. (Ha!)


Next, the instructor introduced philos. The bonding kind of love you feel for a dear family member or a good friend. This kind of love is deep and has the other person's best interest at heart. I looked around the room. And what do you know? To the right of me, sat a mom and a daughter. They were linked arm in arm. They had to be mother and daughter because the dark haired one looked like a younger version of the gray-haired one. They seemed very close. At one point, the dark-haired one pulled out a granola bar, split it half and gave a piece to the gray-haired one. "Okay," I thought. There's philos in action." Again, another great visual aid.


Well, next, the instructor introduced agape love. Now, keep in mind, I've been in classes all day. My rear end is starting to go numb. My mind is wandering to what I'm going to make for dinner and which children will have what homework. "Okay, back on track. Back to agape." I tried to focus.


So, the instructor then explained that AGAPE is the God-like love—unconditional love that forgives and endures. He talked about how agape love could not be shaken or altered and that it is the heart of God that we as humans would experience if we could experience love in its fullness. I think to myself, "Well, there's no visual aid for that." I got my protein bar out of my bag and took a bite. My eyes wandered. That's when I noticed a couple sitting right in front of me. A gray-haired man and a gray-haired woman. I guessed they were in their late 60s. There was nothing stand-out obvious about this couple except for, at one point, the husband fixed his wife's knitted sweater that had fallen off her shoulder. How sweet.  Then, it happened. A long, loud, bodily sound accompanied by a gassy smell came from the gray-haired woman. Ugghh! Can you imagine a quiet room of 200 people and having that happen to you?  Unfortunately, there was no way to disguise it. She had "tooted" and everyone—at least those of us close by—knew it. I shifted in my chair feeling her pain but at the same time feeling gratitude that it was her and not I. (Does that count as philos?)


Well, right then, this woman's husband, slowly but surely, lifted his right arm, stretched it around her and lovingly patted her on her the shoulder. He even gave her a little pull towards him as if to say, "It's okay. I love you."


"Ah! Agape!" I couldn't resist. I turned to my friend and whispered, "Did you see that? THAT! THAT'S AGAPE!" We giggled silently with hearts full! We had witnessed Agape at its peak. Maybe no one else around thought so. But we sure did. And it was beautiful! (A little smelly, but beautiful.)

 That day, I can honestly say love was in the air!

To the couple who sat in front of me at Education Week 2009, I thank you! In you, I saw AGAPE in action. You know, I can't remember much more about that class—not even the instructor's name. But thanks to those three couples, I will remember the lessons of love never to be forgotten.

To have love is to give love. 

Happy LOVE Day.